Saturday, March 12, 2016

Sometimes that 10% Feels Like So Much More.....



When Christ came to the Americas and visited the Nephites, He made sure that their scriptures included prophecies that had been made and fulfilled which, for some weird reason, the Nephites had neglected to do. He also made sure that their scriptures contained information written by a prophet who had lived in Jerusalem 200 years after Lehi had left, so they wouldn’t have been able to take his words with them. What, you may ask, was this important piece of scripture? It was about tithing. Now all of our standard works contain this information.

What does it usually mean when the Lord repeats himself? First, it must be awfully important for us to know; and, second, it must be something with which we struggle to an embarrassing degree. Yep, tithing fits right in there with those criteria, doesn’t it?

Tithing is really a small portion of our income, yet it is so hard for many of us, myself included. It’s not that I don’t believe that I must obey the Lord’s commandments, nor have I failed to gain a testimony of this principle. I have lived its blessings. And being obedient feels amazing. But there is agency, mine and my husband’s. Neither of us has the right to force the other to do something, which includes being obedient to all the commandments. I know that sounds weird. It is unnatural, in a sense, but this is really a time for all of us to learn and grow and experience and, hopefully, come out the other side better and stronger people.

This month I met someone who, by all appearances, is living a “successful” life. She is a Relief Society president. She and her husband have several children and grandchildren. She is very nice. At least one of her sons, who happens to be in the ward we just left, has been a bishop and a member of his stake’s high council. I would imagine there are others in the family who have so served.
Today I learned something I hadn’t expected to learn:  Her son, the one we know, really isn’t her son. She said she’d like to take credit, but she’s really his stepmother. And I suddenly felt a kinship. She is a stepmother. The only more thankless task, I think, is that of being a stepfather. Love and kindness in a biological (or adoptive) relationship is tough enough without the added “feelings.” It’s always the feelings, isn’t it?

At any rate, I have recently been having similar experiences where I look at others and feel like I know who they are only to be surprised to learn something completely unexpected about them. Fortunately, in the life I have led, I rarely feel judgment upon learning of the clay feet of most of us mortals. It is almost comforting. This I understand. I also know someone who literally was a bishop and was excommunicated while serving in that capacity. His wife told me. It was a huge surprise. But then I realized I liked them more. I loved them more. They had and likely will still be suffering for a long time. I can only imagine the way they have been treated by others. What a joy to honestly look at them and realize I still want to be their friend. I still want to be supportive and kind. I want to see them walk through this experience and get out on the other side successfully.

Back to tithing – we have struggled with this principle for years, as I said. But it is a commandment. The promises of God are true. Our faith still wavers, however, and we strive to work out some of the obstacles in our way so that we can follow our faith rather than our fear. My prayer is that those who know us who may hear about this (who would tell them, I wonder?) will not think less of us but rather recognize in us kindred spirits who are just stumbling through life’s rocky terrain, but we haven’t given up. 

May all of us be willing to see one another this way. It was so important for the Savior to make sure the Nephites had Malachi’s teachings about the Law of Tithing, so it is clearly a very important law. It was also important to Him that He should atone for our sins and give us the wonderful blessing of repentance so we can be forgiven. Makes me want to say, “Wait, what? You only want 10 percent? Seriously?”

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